i need to talk to you. i dont wanna sleep or take a nap with you. i dont want to have sex. i dont wanna do anything dirty. i wanna talk to you :[
there are so many things i need to clear up . . . and yet it seems like this every time i need to i get so overcome and distracted by you that i can not. i lose my train of thought and i seem to not get anything done.alas when i do try to get to you it is a never ending maze. at the start i choke up and lose my place because i am too hesitant to even start our talk. then it gets going and picks up its pace. i lay out what i have to say and how its bothering me it at the moment. i just wanna talk to you and tell you how i feel but during the conversation i get lost, frustrated, and my thoughts get jumbled up. i do not want you to take it as fighting at all. i am honestly trying to talk and have an open relationship with you.
baby all i ask is for you to be receptive, practically willing to consider and accept what i have to say without being annoyed by my worries. for the past year i just wanted your input and comfort to guide me through this maze. you know that is the only way of how to fix it or at least make me shut up.
the fact of leaving a person while they are down and crying can make things even worse. nothing good can come from that. i understand that you want to get out of this situation but that direct route is going in the wrong direction and i hope you know that. being alone is not how i wanted to feel while i was crying.
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you told me that i should not worry when you go out. and to tell you the truth, lately i havent been. i have been trying to let you have fun with your friends and text you a bit less. frankly now i am fine with it. ill fill in the rest of my day with sleeping or contributing my hours to the much needed completion of homework.
i am going to be frank. that day just bothered me because you told me that "girl" was going. from the things that i have heard from amanda i have a reason to be worried. the fact that she had flirted with one of your friends while she aparently had a boyfriend messed with me. mix this in with how you are unaware of when a girl is flirting with you and you get what i am thinking in my head. reasonable yea? somewhat bitter that she was there nonetheless when you came back onto the phone with me i missed you completely and wanted nothing more than to spill my affection onto you. the next few days bitterness turned into anger and frusteration again and i did not know where to direct it. baby i am sorry that it went onto you. :/ *sighh* we cleared this up though during halloween so there is no use for talking about it now.
back to the regular subject: as i told you before, i do trust you. i just do not trust other girls. they can be sly and flirtatious as well and you would not even know it.
over the past few days i have been upset at the fact that you said that not at the fact that you were going out. that statement made it seem as though you did not respect me nor how i felt. that is all that i was mad at you for, not that you go out. i know you would not flirt with another girl while you are going out with me. i cried because you were leaving while things were unsettled. this made me feel alone and like you still did not care that i was crying out for you. *sighhh* i just wanted to clear that up for you baby.
bryan, baby after you read this, can we please go back to normal.
i am going to be frank. that day just bothered me because you told me that "girl" was going. from the things that i have heard from amanda i have a reason to be worried. the fact that she had flirted with one of your friends while she aparently had a boyfriend messed with me. mix this in with how you are unaware of when a girl is flirting with you and you get what i am thinking in my head. reasonable yea? somewhat bitter that she was there nonetheless when you came back onto the phone with me i missed you completely and wanted nothing more than to spill my affection onto you. the next few days bitterness turned into anger and frusteration again and i did not know where to direct it. baby i am sorry that it went onto you. :/ *sighh* we cleared this up though during halloween so there is no use for talking about it now.
back to the regular subject: as i told you before, i do trust you. i just do not trust other girls. they can be sly and flirtatious as well and you would not even know it.
over the past few days i have been upset at the fact that you said that not at the fact that you were going out. that statement made it seem as though you did not respect me nor how i felt. that is all that i was mad at you for, not that you go out. i know you would not flirt with another girl while you are going out with me. i cried because you were leaving while things were unsettled. this made me feel alone and like you still did not care that i was crying out for you. *sighhh* i just wanted to clear that up for you baby.
bryan, baby after you read this, can we please go back to normal.
