it comes time and time again. that feeling, fuck damn disgust. it just runs chills all over the body, then your chest starts hurting, and it feels as if you can no longer breathe. its a moment when you wish you were sleeping to get your mind off of it, so that you can imagine a better place. but alas you are trapped again, as if you are a side show attraction in that certain cage where people poke at you over and over till you can not stand it anymore. this is when you blow up . . . how horrible.no one ever will warn you how it will feel when you first step in the water. all fun at first, till you get in too deep and start to drown. people try to give you a life line but ehhh, you think youre too proud for it. "i can swim all by myself," you say. "oh im fine," you scream out loud so that coincidentally everyone can hear you. it is a subconcious cry out for help, you need someone there to break down that wall and be stubborn and not listen to a word you are saying and rescue you.
